THANK GOD, the semester is finally coming to a close. As I mentioned last time, this semester has been overly challenging due to the lack of time for, you know, EVERYTHING. But tonight's my last final of the semester, and I'm hoping for another A- average as I've had every semester since starting just over a year ago.
It's weird thinking back to the drama that accompanied a re-entry into academics. I remember the months - MONTHS - of soul-searching, trying to decide what to study, where to go, what to do... and even when I entered the classroom in January last year I was still unsure of my choice. Hell, I'm still unsure! But I remember settling back into academics relatively easily. It wasn't until I started overloading my plate with internships and part-time jobs that the going got harder. But even so, looking at everything I've accomplished, I can't help but be proud. Somehow I was able to pull it together and, contrary to what I intended, will be graduating in December this year, rather than May next year as I'd originally thought.
Up until a few weeks ago I had completely dismissed the idea of walking at graduation in December. First, my parents weren't able to come, and we'd compensated with a family Christmas planned for the following week in MN. Second, remembering my undergraduate commencement and how anti-climactic it was, I just wasn't too interested in wasting several hours of my time, spending the money on a robe and hat, and listening to people droll on and on about post-graduate life. However, I got to thinking about it the other day, and my thoughts on it have changed.
It's been a shit year... no, it's been a shit almost-two-years. We've been through a lot, we've struggled, we've cried, we've stressed... and by God I should celebrate. I guess I just woke up one day and realized that, if I don't walk at graduation, I'm simply taking my piece of paper as if nothing special has happened. But no, we've been through a lot. And in a way graduation will provide closure to the last two shit years. It will hopefully end a chapter of our lives that has been incredibly negative and depressing, and will hopefully begin a new chapter. That new chapter holds many new opportunities and experiences: the "Grow Up" chapter, the part of the story where life gets better, where we are able to support ourselves, where we can buy a house, start a family, have good-paying jobs we actually enjoy. And I have to acknowledge that change. If I don't, then what has this time been worth? This is the moment we've been waiting for: waiting for my real life to begin.
I know, it all seems very over-dramatic. And maybe it is. But there's symbolism here, there's meaning, and it can't be treated as just another moment. It's got to be a big deal, or else the last two years have meant nothing, and the future will mean nothing also.
So there's that. December 15, 2012, Colorado Convention Center, I'll walk across that stage and take my Masters in Marketing degree, and I'll close on this chapter of my life and venture into the future with a renewed sense of being.
Hell, maybe we'll even start a new book.
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